If You’ve Ever Allowed a Three-Year-Old’s Temper Tantrum to Ruin You, Then Keep Reading
… and learn the no-nonsense approach to positive parenting and raising emotionally intelligent kids
You’re in the middle of the supermarket and your three-year-old is in full meltdown mode over an icicle. There’s yelling, there are tears and snot flying everywhere. Do you:
A. Give in and buy the icicle because you’re way too embarrassed
B. Engage in a yelling match with your kid, i.e. lose your marbles completely
C. Drag your kid yelling and screaming out of the supermarket
D. Calmly but firmly stand your ground and tell your little one there are snacks waiting for them at home?
Now that you look at it, the correct answer is probably obvious. In the heat of the moment, however, most parents will react instinctively and they’ll do irrational things due to stress and exhaustion.
Let’s face it – even the best and kindest of kids throw temper tantrums. In fact, statistics show that 87% of 18 to 24-month-olds will have a total meltdown every once in a while.
But it doesn’t end there. Of all three to four-year-olds, 50% will still continue with the temper tantrums. How long can you stand your ground when these become a regular occurrence?
Even moms who are as cool as a cucumber will want to punch the wall simply because a five-year-old can’t be rationalized with. Being a parent is tough. Learning through trial and error, however, isn’t an option when your kid’s wellbeing and future are on the line.
Mastering the right parenting techniques early on in life is important because:
● Intense early childhood parental involvement helps kids develop to the best of their abilities
● Mindful parenting also contributes to better social development for children
● Positive parenting can impact generations – not only your kids but the way they interact with their own children
● You will be establishing a bond with your child that will last a lifetime
You certainly understand the importance of being a hands-on parent. Like many others, however, you may be clueless about how to approach discipline, boundaries and positive reinforcement.
Good parenting is based on mutual respect, open communication and transparency. This is just one of the key lessons included in the latest book by child development experts Aileen Jarvis and Rowan Roffe.
As a bonus, the book will apply the techniques to real-life situations that parents struggle with. If you dread mealtime or getting kids ready for kindergarten in the morning, this book is for YOU!
Targeted Age Group:: 25-55
What Inspired You to Write Your Book?
From my experience raising my own children and working with other parents, I came realize how we parents are so radically underprepared to cope with the stress of parenting.
You must have had one of those days where you wished things were different. The little one comes crying to you for having stuck a peanut in their nostrils, having misplaced their hat, which obviously they are wearing, or because they wanted to play in the snow when it's 40 degrees outside. You find play-doh stuck on your favorite rug, jam on your new shirt, and lipstick marks on the walls. Yes, we all have had those days, and the worst part, this doesn't stop there. The absurdities continue to grow with every passing day, leaving you wishing for a time machine.
But you also can't forget the moment you held them in your hands for the first time, and they smiled back at you. Wasn't that beautiful too? You knew, at that moment, there can be nothing more beautiful than this.
Parenting isn't easy. It wasn't supposed to be! And we say this because we have had dozens of parents come to us to discuss the not-so-good habits of their kids and try to make sense of that behavior. We get it. You want the best for your children. You want them to rise up to their true potential, have strong personalities, be empathetic towards others, be emotionally-intelligent, and well-behaved. You want them to do good in school, learn compassion, have meaningful relationships, be noble, and be disciplined as opposed to throwing tantrums all over the place, questioning your ability as a parent.
But what if, in one sane moment, you see things from their perspectives. Are they really wrong? Would you not have done the same had you been in their shoes? You made them sit in their car seat forcefully and then bribed them with ice cream on the way back if they stayed quiet and behaved well. What else would you expect from a kid who doesn't understand the concept of promises yet?
Here's where we, as parents, are erroneous. We are trying to raise them using submission rather than giving them a purpose to change their behavior or actions for good. Parenting with purpose is about nurturing and empowering your child in a non-violent manner that offers guidance and recognition. It is also about setting some boundaries, rewarding good behavior, and reprimanding negative ones using mindful intentions instead of punishment.
It entails leading by example, being a teacher and mentor, showing care, being sensitive towards their needs, offering consistent support and bouts of motivation, encouraging them to be independent, providing affection and emotional security, helping them differentiate between positive and negative habits, making room for healthy communication, rewarding small accomplishments, supporting their best interests, and demonstrating empathy.
Speaking at a lecture on the Origins of Human Cooperation, psychologist Michael Tomasello stated that:
From when they first begin to walk and talk and become truly cultural beings, young human children are naturally cooperative and helpful in many—though obviously not all—situations. And they do not get this from adults; it comes naturally. (Tomasello, 2008)
If that is true, our job is basically half done. They already have the potential to distinguish right from wrong. We just need to provide them with the right situations. This is the goal of parenting with purpose—offering the child guidance so that they move in the right direction. It improves communication as well as the mutual bond between you and your child. It allows you to teach them the right values, comprehend where they are coming from, and set attainable goals for them to excel in.
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